I think this is the right feeling. this is the right mentality. i played a session today, pretty long. 1 table of 400 n 3 tables of 200. i sat down and immediately got stacked twice with AK. both times I had at least TPTK and lost to AA. ok, coolers. Then i proceed to miss most of my draws and my cbets were not getting c-raised and a lot of just standard suckouts. easy theory below...

you miss ur draws when you need it

+

your opponent c-raise u all-in on flop w/flush draw and hits

+

your cbets constantly getting looked up

= bad downswing

so yeah..just a lot of coolers. it was actulay a lot. ryan sweated me for the majority of my session and I think his presence made me feel like I cannot tilt. It's just embarrassing when you tilt because you are just not supposed to do it. and its even more when he looks up to my game. I didn't want to disappoint him by putting up a poor display. results wise, yes i lost quite a bit but performance wise i think i played very well. It definitely could've been better, but i didn't tilt and didn't really make any stupid plays. for the most part i trusted my read and if i'm wrong, ok then i lose the pot, but i also learned, which is the key. so i ran pretty bad and was imagining to have like a -2k+ day...i checked my PT and i was only down 1.2k and i was psyched. for the first time ever i felt great about losing 1.2k. it might seem a lot but its just 3 buy ins at 400 and 6 buy ins at 200, neither of which consitutes anything serious....and thankfully my bankroll can easily take it

i'm feeling pretty confident about where poker is taking me and i'm going to work on improving. alwyas room to improve. if i could stay focused during today's run then i can stay focused pretty much anytime. i had some really bad beats today and i kept my cool. i'm pretty proud of that and i'm even more proud of myself not getting pissed at all for gonig down 1.2k. and 1.2k is a lota money.......i guess i'm just on my way to becomin more big dog lol.

i realized that it doesn't really bohter me much wen i go down a lot because of coolers. it bothers me the most and it tilts me when I think i've made bad plays and the bad plays are costing me. i don't mind gettin outdrawn (i do but not as much) for pots since i did "get it in as a fav" I just hate making stupid calls/plays and end up losing......so i guess in short i'm just really hard on myself and i think that's a good thing. i now have a extenisve list of ppl to share talk hands with and i think that will dramatically improve my thinking process. also, since booshiet1 is pretty famous on ub now if i tilt ppl will see and let me know about it. so if you're a ub player and u read this by all means try to tilt me and try to take my money wen i'm not playing my A game because when I am, you have NO chance.